<body><script type="text/javascript"> function setAttributeOnload(object, attribute, val) { if(window.addEventListener) { window.addEventListener('load', function(){ object[attribute] = val; }, false); } else { window.attachEvent('onload', function(){ object[attribute] = val; }); } } </script> <div id="navbar-iframe-container"></div> <script type="text/javascript" src="https://apis.google.com/js/plusone.js"></script> <script type="text/javascript"> gapi.load("gapi.iframes:gapi.iframes.style.bubble", function() { if (gapi.iframes && gapi.iframes.getContext) { gapi.iframes.getContext().openChild({ url: 'https://www.blogger.com/navbar.g?targetBlogID\x3d21349742\x26blogName\x3dKatieJane+Garside\x26publishMode\x3dPUBLISH_MODE_BLOGSPOT\x26navbarType\x3dBLACK\x26layoutType\x3dCLASSIC\x26searchRoot\x3dhttps://katiejanegarside.blogspot.com/search\x26blogLocale\x3den_US\x26v\x3d2\x26homepageUrl\x3dhttp://katiejanegarside.blogspot.com/\x26vt\x3d8574382159384899865', where: document.getElementById("navbar-iframe-container"), id: "navbar-iframe" }); } }); </script>

Thursday, April 13, 2006

the lift

self preservation comes at such a price, sometimes, most times i want to be left clean alone, though its worth remembering the walls start jostling for position when alone is too alone, context is everything to be 'amongst', life was 'bad' back then, now you could never call it 'bad', it is stimulating, dangerous, challenging and the work is working, so i did escape, what can i say more than that really, 'do you want to fucking fight me?', welsh accent, well yes, better that than lying down for the long sleep, better than endless attempts at miraculous healing, here's the news: there is no illness, i just got trapped in a lift for a while, nothing more, when you can't open a door it is fucking frightening, fight and flee in enclosed spaces is messy and sometimes the door never opens, nobody turns the power back on and infact the building has collapsed in on the lift shaft and you are entombed, it does happen but it hasn't happened to me yet even though i have lived most of my life as if that were my perpetual state

not today though


i think i'm awake


Anonymous Anonymous said...

This is one of the most profound things I've ever read, and I've quoted it many a times. I admire how ingenuous you are. I don't mean to sound like a flatterer--what I'm saying is the honest truth!

Anyway, I've been a fan of your blog for ages: long time reader, first time commenter. I hope to read more of your entries in the future.


5:49 AM  
Anonymous ColeMarie said...

Awake is hard sometimes.

6:34 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Your writing evokes how easy it is to get locked into a sensory loop where every little thing leads back inexorably to the one big thing - hope all concerned can find their way out and beyond. xx

12:26 AM  

Post a Comment

Links to this post:

Create a Link

<< Home